Heroine of Time
by SSJ-Jolt
Summary: Link is a girl with an important mission. She is on a Quest to save all of Hyrule with the aid of her perverted fairy, Navi. What insanity could possibly occur?
1. Enter the Heroine

Disclaimer: I don't own the Legend of Zelda… buggeration…

Jolt: HEY HEY HEY! Yet another random fic from me!

Link: Oh Goddesses…

Jolt: This time there's a twist! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!

* * *

"WHERE ART THOU NAVI?" A deep booming voice called out within the Forbidden Woods. 

The reply can from behind a nearby bush, "I'm here Great Deku tree! J-Just give me a sec…" The massive tree sweatdropped at the nervous note in the reply from whatever was in the bush.

A few seconds later a glowing blue ball flew out of the bush holding a fairy sized doujin in its small arms blushing furiously.

The Great Deku Tree just stared for a few minutes trying to get its head around the sight in front of it. "UH…"

"What did you want me for sir?" The fairy, Navi, asked.

"OH… RIGHT… YES, OF COURSE…" The tree coughed nervously, "THE TIME HATH COME FOR THE ONE WITHOUT A FAIRY TO BEGINTH THINE JOURNEY, NAVI, YE SHALL GUIDETH THEM ONE THINE QUEST!"

"I have no idea what you just said but ok…" Navi replied as she flew off into the Kokiri woods.

As she flew under one Kokiri's legs she called out, "Nice ass!" scaring the heck out of the poor guy and kept going. She flew to half way through the small Kokiri village when she saw the tree house she was searching for and flew inside.

One the bed with its back towards her was a seven year old wearing normal Kokiri clothes consisting of a green tunic, boots and a green pointy hat. Navi flew over and nudged the child's shoulder, "Hey! Time to wake up!"

Nothing but a snore…

Navi decided the only way to wake such a lazy child was the only sane thing to do…

Go ballistic.

"WAKE UP YOU LAZY LITTLE SHIT BEFORE I DO SOMETHING THAT WILL GET ME ARRESTED!" Navi screamed scaring the crap out of several nearby Kokiri.

Slowly the child got up and stretched blinking a few times it spotted the fairy and grinned with a cry, "Hello Miss Fairy! Will you be my Fairy?" the child batted its eyelashes and looked at Navi with it's big blue eyes, then Navi realized something…

Navi let out a shriek and nearly had a heart attack, "YOU'RE A GIRL?"

"Yep! For as long as I can remember!" the girl replied.

"But your names Link right…? And your wearing boys clothes…?" Navi stammered.

"Uh huh!" Link giggled, "I don't like girls clothes!"

Navi twitched. She had been robbed! Violated! All her hopes and dreams came shattering to pieces before her very eyes in the form of a female hero… not the well endowed male hero she had so often had wet dreams of…

Link poked the fairy with a concerned look on her face, "Miss Fairy? Are you ok?"

Navi snapped out of it after realizing she was getting aroused, "No I'm ok… I'm Navi! I'm your partner from now on! Come on! The Deku tree wants to see you!"

Link squealed and ran out the door of her tree house with Navi close behind. As the girl got ready to climb down the ladder she heard someone call her name. Turning to see she grinned and waved as she saw it was her best friend, Saria!

"Yahoo! Good Morning Link!" Saria cried with glee.

Link quickly jumped down the ladder and greeted her friend, "Saria look it!" she pointed at Navi who was flying near Link's head.

"Wow! A fairy!" Saria gasped, "Finally a fairy came to you Link!"

Link giggled along with her friend as Saria continued, "Wow! This is great news! I'm so happy for you! Now you're a true Kokiri, Link!" Saria wrapped Link up in a big hug as the two giggled together.

"Yeah! And the Deku Tree even summoned me!" Link squealed.

"Wow! It's a huge honour to be summoned by the Deku Tree! You'd better not keep him waiting too long! See you later!" Saria shooed Link off to see the big tree that protected the forest.

Link skipped through the village until she reached the path that lead to the Deku Tree only to find it blocked by another Kokiri by the name of Mido. He held out his hand and said, "Nuh Uh! No way are you going through!"

Link used her best puppy dog eyes and pleaded, "Please Mido?" she pouted, "The Deku Tree has summoned me!"

Mido crumbled under the puppy eyes and caved in, "Alright… but you need something to protect yourself with like a sword and shield or something…"

Link nodded and ran off think where in the forest she could get those. Shrugging she went over to the Know-It-All Brothers house and spotted the small hole she had always wanted to but never had explored.

She walked over to the hole and looked around and since no one was looking she crawled into the hole with a triumphant grin. As she crawled through the hole she thought about what lay ahead in her life, what would she do? What would she see? Would she get to go on a grand adventure and save princesses? The dreams of danger and adventure got the young girls heart racing as she crawled out of that cramped space and looked around.

She was in a strangely shaped rocky area with a big boulder rolling in circles and lots of grass. Link shrugged and followed the boulder around until she noticed something weird.

After a closer look Link realized it was a chest and with a cry of, "Whee! Treasure!" she shoved it open and pulled out the long lost Kokiri Sword! Link swung it a few times in her left hand and smiled.

Navi suddenly asked, "You're left handed?"

Link nodded, "Yeppers!" she then quickly made her way out of the swords old hiding spoke and back into the Kokiri Village.

She swiftly equipped her sword and ran back to her house seeing was Saria gone on the way before climbing the ladder and entering her house.

"What are you doing?" Navi asked as she hovered near the door.

"I'm grabbing some stuff!" Link replied as she half disappeared under her bed.

Several minutes later Link re-emerged with a Deku Shield, several Deku Nuts, three Deku Sticks and a whole lot of dust on her. Link packed up all her stuff in her tunic and pack and sneezed before giggling and leaving the house again.

Now fully equipped Link ran back to Mido and grinned, "Can I go past now?" she asked in her sweetest voice.

Mido blushed and noticed her sword and shield, "UH! T-The Kokiri sword AND a Deku Shield…?" Mido blinked then stepped aside, "Go right on ahead…" he watched Link run past him with a smile on her face, "There's no way she's Kokiri…" he muttered.

* * *

Jolt: So what do you readers think so far? 

Link: Oo I… I'm a GIRL!

Jolt: Read and Review! –runs from Link-


	2. The Deku Tree

Blue eyes with brown splotches looked towards the Hyrulian sun with a meaningful gaze as a hand reached up and stocked a stray black hair out of the little owner's eyes. The boy was only seven years old and had already chosen a dangerous path. He looked down at his mount with a trusting look. The massive flightless bird looked back towards it's rider with a curious expression to which it only got a grin in reply. The boy wore a black shirt with a red open vest over it and baggy black pants with Red stripes down each leg tucked into his brown leather boots. He wore silver armour on his left shoulder and forearm with sported a gold trim. On his back rested a normal enough bastard sword positioned so he could draw it with his right hand.

The bird was massive and had tiny wings that had little hope of lifting the large creature. It had purple feathers that seemed to become rainbow coloured near the tips, it's neck and legs bore no feathers and it's relatively small head suggested little intelligence. It wore a saddle that held a silver piece of armour across the bird's breast with had golden trim and a strange crest emblazoned on it.

The boy smiled and commented, "So this is Hyrule? Mother was right… it is amazing!" He gave the bird a soft pat and tugged the reins and wondered out loud, "I wonder if I can find the artefact? Or maybe even Father?" He snapped the reins and caused the bird to race towards the lands called Hyrule.

Meanwhile in Kokiri Woods...

Small legs raced along the pathway towards the Great Deku Tree's clearing. Round blue eyes stared up at the giant old tree in awe. Link slowed her pace as she neared the dip in the ground leading to the great protector of the forest.

"LINK…" The great tree's voice boomed though it seemed cracked and weak. Immediately the little Kokiri girl knew something was wrong with the Deku Tree.

"Great Deku Tree…? What's wrong?" The tiny girl asked with a combination of fear and love. This was the being that had protected her, her entire life, if she could return that in any way she would.

The tree was silent a moment then replied weakly, "LINK… A GREAT EVIL HAS CAST A POWERFUL CURSE ON ME… I AM DIEING…" Link reared back in shock as her heart skipped a beat in horror of the thought however the tree wasn't done, "AN EVIL MAN ON A BLACK HORSE CAME TO ME AND DEMANDED THE SACRED STONE OF THE FOREST. I REFUSED AND NOW I SUFFER… LINK… YOU WHO ARE UNLIKE THE OTHER KOKIRI… I BESEECH THEE… ENTER… YOU WILL KNOW THINE WAY…" With that cryptic speech the great tree opened what appeared to be a mouth in it's body so the little one could enter.

Scared out of her wits the girl refused to turn down a challenge that would allow her to get one up on Mido. Swallowing deeply she ran into the great tree. Inside was dank and dark. Link felt a shiver run up her spine as she figured out she could hardly see inside the massive tree. She then remembered Navi and looked around for the fairy before realizing something was under her hat. Squeaking in fright she pulled the hat off to find an extremely distraught fairy in a very compromising position. Link blinked and asked, "Miss Navi? What are you doing?"

"Um…" Navi began as she covered herself as best she could with full naughty magazine she had somehow got a hold of between meeting Link and reaching the Deku Tree, "I was… just… uh…" She blushed furiously at being caught doing _that_ then looked up and shrieked, "LINK!! BEHIND YOU!!"

Link leapt away from where she had been standing only to come face to eye with a strange eye with two legs, one on either side of it's body and a single tiny knot of hair on top of the eye. It leapt at her and with an 'eep' Link ran like hell for the nearest door.

The young girl opened her yes and was greeted by the sight of several mushrooms leading towards a large chest. She looked over at Navi and politely asked, "May I have some light." Navi turned into a glowing ball with wings and a magazine wrapped around it and flew up casting her light over the entire room. Nothing else really stood out so Link made her way across the mushrooms to the chest.

She grinned when she saw it was locked and shouted out, "Yay! Treasure for Link!" and kicked the chest open. Her blue eyes lit up when she saw what was inside and pulled out a long lost slingshot. She spun around and struck a triumphant pose only to squeak when she saw the mushrooms had deflated down into a pit. She knew she couldn't make it back now and began to cry.

However no tears ever reached her cheeks as Navi called out, "Link! Look up here! I think it's a ladder! Try shooting it with that slingshot you just got!" Link blinked and broke into a wide smile and took aim carefully, her fairy friend noting that the girl was left handed, soon a Deku seed shot through the air and hit the ladder, knocking it loose and causing it to fall in just the right way to let Link escape the room.

As Link reached the door she gulped and held the slingshot tightly and quickly made her way through and prepared to fire on the evil eyeball thing…

Only for her eyes to bug out when she saw two extra of the creature and a much bigger, meaner looking one that could only be called the mother of all evil eyeball thingy monsters. Suddenly the mother leapt down a deep hole and the three little ones began to creep towards Link. The girl went to step back and hit the door, finding it now barred off. She let out a scream and let fly with six Deku seeds in quick succession.

One of the Eye monsters fell dead while another's eye rolled back in pain. The third was missed completely and leapt at the girl. She rolled to the side and drew her sword with her left hand and glared at the creature with tears in her eyes. She growled, "You're the one's hurting the Great Deku Tree… I won't forgive you!" She leapt at the eye and slashed twice killing it. Suddenly she ran at the remaining one and leapt forward, rolling on the ground and thrusting her sword into the remaining eye creature while screaming, "I WON'T FORGIVE YOU!!!"

She stood up and took a deep breath before running to the hole the Queen had leapt down and leapt down also with Navi in hot pursuit.

When Link opened her eyes she was within a massive hollow area when a chewing noise could be heard. She could see Navi nearby reading her magazine and began to look around for the cause of the noise. Soon she looked up and spotted the glowing eye of the queen and gasped when she realized, "She's… _eating_ the Great Deku Tree?!"

The Queen dropped to the ground with enough force to cause Link to fall over and growled, "I am Queen Gohma! Give me the stone! …Or should I curse you as well?" It gave an evil cackle and made to charge at Link who quickly began to fire seeds at the giant parasite only to have them bounced off harmlessly. Gohma cackled and raised it's lower eyelid as used it's powerful eye stalk to pin Link to the ground in an attempt to crush her to death.

Link struggled to free herself and screamed, "Navi! Help me!"

The fairy barely heard Link cry out the first time though it brought her back to reality enough to understand Link's second agonized scream, possibly from a rib cracking. The blue fairy spun around and gasped to the sight of the parasite queen killing her charge. Enraged Navi roared, "GET AWAY FROM HER YOU BITCH!!" and ditched her magazine at the parasite queen with all her might.

The magazine twirled through the air oblivious to the chaos that reigned in that moment. Navi's eyes bore into the parasite queen with pure hate, Gohma stared with glee as Link screamed as her rib went from cracked to broken.

Then the magazine struck Gohma's eye causing the creature to rear back in pain before collapsing stunned. Link weakly pulled herself to her feet before swing viciously at Gohma's eye three times before thrusting the blade in to the hilt.

Gohma pulled herself free and shrieked into pain as her green blood splattered out of her now blind eye. Soon magical flames exploded all across her body and she fell into a pile of dust.

Link breathed heavily as a circle of light formed. Navi flew over to her injured charge and, with tears in her eyes, said, "Oh Link… I'm sorry… let's get out of here and get some rest. The Great Deku Tree should be fine now… I'm certain." And so the two entered the circle of light and let it envelope them completely.


End file.
